Friday, June 29, 2007

On thinking green...

the colour green has been speaking to me...maybe it's the hope of what it represents. the fresh cutting of grass. the arrival of spring on a 727. or maybe it's just the bright happiness of the colour. anyway, i hear my soul speaking, chatting up a storm when i see this colour: dream the dreams soon forgotten. forget what was said of you when. be the person you alone know you could be. and, don't go down the road of, " i forgot what i thought about me in kindergarten" and only remember that me from what they said in grad school and the rest of the professional existence. so i was a bad employee and talked all the time...i can do nothing but talk. talk i did, about everything from morning cereal to fears of the soul...to the latest song on vh1's artist you "oughta know". spring is alive in my heart and shoes, and i run to it. i jump in it with as much know how as i had when i started school...or looked up school: can't remember which one it is. needless to say, i am naive. but...HOPEFUL. and this is what keeps me going towards that me in the green...the green. oh yeah...green is my colour. my colour of starting what i thought that i finished but didn't quite start, but knew that i needed to...green come get me. oh, the green...
So i am thinking and felt the need to write...a song dips from my lips and tells me to be ok with who i am and am trying to be. i am a daughter of the world...the stories of everyone speaks to me and tells me to write. i have to write. clears my head makes my eyes shinny again; crystallizing all that i see and feel. there seems to be so many stories...hope they come soft enough so that i can pick one and go on with it till it has spoken it's final syllable.

you ever know something great is about to break...feel like you have stepped into a new life...a comfort settles and whisks you away with this truth and it is not labour but an immense satisfaction in just being...being grateful for the moment that brings this new life to your door. grateful for the knowledge of what will come. just some thoughts i wanted to write down.

Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Hanging with Caya...

Since Caya has come...a new me has appeared. Well maybe this me was here all along but needed a nudge in the right direction. I am growing and doing things that I always thought was possible for everyone else...I feel free. strong. on purpose...the music fills the space between and I am dancing within. Being called up is wonderful...Caya's birth has called me up. and I am answering the call. I hear Brett Dennen saying, "tell them this child has grown". Yeah...tell them, because this is the truth. This child has grown and will grow even more. I see who I can be...and WILL be in the light of her eyes...they speak loud and with love telling me to go on and be me with all the glorious...oh, the glorious